Myspace

Check out my myspace at www.myspace.com/jenn_beautiful1 for a better blog on my life!

Holy crap has it ever been a long time since my last post... I guess theres quite a bit to tell... first off - JACKI AND I ARE FRIENDS AGAIN!!!! - sweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet. *cough*
We've been having a blast together, hanging out like old times- we just got back from a trip to Red Lake Falls, MN and I have some pictures to post... I don't have much time to post so I'll put up the pictures and update later - I'm such a slacker - but to be fair - I'm a HORNY slacker - I'm so getting laid tonight - but enough about that... PICTURES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I started that fire and the rest is me and Jacki being retards...more to come...


Jenn

More Quizzes!

Which kind of candy are you?

You're" Skittles!!! You have a very interesting personality, you're so unique. You're the kind of person who always thinks outside of the box. You're also a very accepting individual, and believe in inner beauty.
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What Kind of Shadow Are You? (with gorgeous pics)

You'>http://images.quizilla.com/S/superbean/1078640069_nGirlColor.jpg">
You are a human shadow. If a loved one needs you, you are always right at his or her heels! Your deep social connection with human beings produces your qualities of genuine caring and charisma. However, at times you are naive to the true nature of your loved ones. Remember that humans' gift of free will does not always lead them in wise directions. But your essence of love and friendship represent the other precious gifts of humanity. Overall you are a strikingly valuable and innocent being who has a lot to give.(please rate my quiz cuz it took me for freaking ever to create)
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What Do the Hogwarts People Think of You? (girls only!)

Harry is amazed by you and has a crush on you.Ron thinks you're perfect for his best friend and wants you two to get together.Hermione thinks you're a good, noble person with a sense of justice.Ginny doesn't like the fact that Harry likes you so much but if he didn't, she would actually consider you a friend.Draco kind of likes you but doesn't want you to know so is a little mean.Neville thinks you're pretty, smart, and loyal.Seamus and Dean stand up for you and like you as a friend.You're one of Hagrid's favorite students.Your house is Gryffindor.
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Which Flower are you? (real pics taken by me!)

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You are the Loving Flower. You are meek in spirit and wise beyond your years. You see the beauty in helping people, (shown in the two butterflies) and you find love to be one of the greatest gifts to mankind. You also respect individuality as well as nature The world needs more people like you! please rate! i worked hard, and even took the pics myself. it only takes a second to make a huge difference to me!
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What type of girl are you many outcomes, beautiful pics(guys can play to)

Youre'>http://images.quizilla.com/M/MI/MID/Midevilgirl/1151904352_rlquizcute.JPG">
Youre just a cute little ball of fluffy cuteness. Everybody loves you cause youre so adorable. You probably get away with a lot of things cause you act so nave. But I wouldnt be surprised if you were really not as innocent as you appear. You probably are a sneaky little devil at times. A true master at being a con-artist. Or maybe you really are as simple minded and cute as you appear. Either way, you seemed to get what you want just fine. You sneaky little devil.
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My Mama

I know that its the spice girls and it's corny but in the spirit of mothers day - which I am celebrating with my mother this weekend - here's a song about the way she makes me feel...

Mama

She used to be my only enemy,

and never let me be free

Catching me in places that I knew I shouldn't be

Every other day, I crossed the line,

I didn't mean to be so bad

I never thought you would become the friend I never had

Back then, I didn't know why,

why you were misunderstood

So now, I see through your eyes,

all that you did was love

Mama, I love you... Mama, I care,

Mama, I love you...Mama, my friend

My friend

I didn't want to hear it then

but I'm not ashamed to say it now,

Every little thing you said and did was right for me

I had a lot of time to think about,

about the way I used to be

Never had a sense of my responsibility

Back then, I didn't know why,

why you were misunderstood

So now, I see through your eyes, all that you did was love

Mama, I love you,

Mama, I care,

Mama, I love you,

Mama, my friend

My friend, you're my friend

But now, I'm sure I know why,

why you were misunderstood

So now, I see through your eyes,

all I can give you is love

Mama, I love you..

Mama, I care....

Mama, I love you..

Mama, my friend

Beautiful

Does it sound like I want one of these for myself? I do - but who knows how long that will be... Forever and a day I'm sure.
This is my cousins baby Teagan sleeping peacefully in my arms - god she IS beautiful isn't she?







You are so Beautiful - Joe Cocker


You are so beautiful..
To me.
You are so beautiful...
To me,
Can't you see?
You're everything I hope for...
You're everything I need...
You are so beautiful,
to me
You are so beautiful
to me
You are so beautiful
To me
Can't you see
You're everything I hope for
You're every, everything I need
You are so beautiful to me

For my one and only Melinda!

Ok so Mel - don't bitch that I never write anything about you in here.... Mel is good people - I enjoy having her in my life because we are able to talk about honest to god everything and give each other important advice and learn from each others mistakes ( well at least so far!)
I have been having conflict of interest in this crazy mixed up world I usually call my life or lack there of and she has been very supportive.
I have times where I become so completely consumed with one emotion and sometimes - in an instant I'm feeeling a completely different mood -
Peanut Gallery: "Yes Jenn - it's called Bi Polar..."
Jenn: Fuck you Peanut Gallery
Jenn swears like a sailor and often refers to herself in third person.
I whine a lot for a life that is pretty damn good - I crave perfection which is stupid because you can never attain something THAT unattainable...

So my problem du jour or the problem that I encounter every month or so - is not being able to let go of my past - and today as I ripped through a box of old videos to find the one special one that I wanted Melinda to witness - she humored me - for over an hour - For that Mel I am so deeply appreciative - who understands me better then you - woman to woman I'm so glad you're here for me - I love you babe ...

I think I'll hold of on dispensing with the drama for another month but thanks for being there with me - it's easier with you there - because I don't clutch a stuffed animal and cry for something I no longer have.

Jenn

xoxo

Random Blurbage

So today is my last day working for NCR - I have to say WOOOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOO!
There isn't a snowmans chance in hell that I would ever come back to work here.
Not even for Jo and Dean - and I LOVE Jo and Dean.
This is just one of the crappiest jobs I have ever had - stress wise that is - the money and hours were pretty good - Now I'm getting better hours and MO' MONEY!
WOOT!
Anyways Back on the ranch...
I'm kind of distracted writing this post - I'm working - well more like slacking...
I've just been taking calls and assigning calls every so often..
Meh....
What are they going to do fire me?

So I've been working on a problem that I have - A problem with jealousy - I'm working on steps to overcome jealousy and remembering the tips I've been given when I start to feel jealous.
When I feel jealous it's normally because Pete mentions a girls name or something a girl said or anything to generally deal with another woman. For some reason when that happens I imagine him cheating on me and all of these thoughts fill my mind with ANGRY jealousy.
So when I have those thoughts - instead of telling Pete how I feel I'm writing it down in a secret journal and rationalizing it - because the problem I have is getting angry really fast and then realizing how stupid it sounded AFTER the fact. Which is dumb... because the only thing I am doing is hurting Pete... which is something he doesn't deserve as he has done nothing wrong.

I'm also trying to figure out what all of these trust issues are about. Pete is my partner - companion - I love him and I have to tell myself when I feel this way that he loves me too and I am just plain crazy for feeling this way in the first place.

So far it's working - I am able to control my feelings.

More later.

Jenn